God Knows Exactly What He's Doing

this is my favorite poem... errr im not sure if this is a poem or what. =) well, i guess God has been watching me for the longest time and when i asked Him to bless me with a child i know He didn't commit a mistake..i know He knows exactly what He's doing...

Special Moms for Special Kids: God Knows Exactly What He's Doing
By Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit.
This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of disabled children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of disabled children are chosen?
Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth, son, patron saint, Matthew. Forrest, Marjorie, daughter, patron saint, Cecilia."
"Rudledge, Carrie, twins, patron saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."
Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," says God. "Could I give a handicapped child a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."
"But has she patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it.
I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has his own world. She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."
"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word.' She will never consider a 'step' ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it! When she describes a tree or a sunset to her blind child, she will see it as few people ever see my creations.
I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty, prejudice... and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."
"And what about her patron saint?" asks the angel, pen poised in midair.
God smiles. "A mirror will suffice

celebrities walking the same walk

i found this list of celebrities whose kids were diagnosed with autism. pero bakit prang si jenny and si toni lang ang active sa autism world?
• Holly Robinson Peete⁶
...Television actress who was on 21 Jump Street and Hangin' with Mr. Cooper

Holly had twins born October 19, 1997 and one of them, Rodney Jr. was diagnosed with autism at age 3. Since then Holly has spoken openly about her son many times.

• Jenny McCarthy⁷

...Former Playboy playmate, actress, author and outspoken anti-vaccine activist

Her son, Evan, born May 18, 2002 has autism. Jenny now says Evan is completely cured. "I made a deal with God," she explains. "I said, 'You fix my boy, you show me the way and I'll teach the world how I did it.'" She blames vaccines for her son's autism, despite the lack of scientific proof.

• John Schneider⁸

...Television actor who played Bo Duke in the 1980s show Dukes of Hazzard and in the 2000s starred in Smallville

John's son Chasen has Asperger's Syndrome. John says, "Chasen responded well to speech and language therapy and went from there to occupational therapy. Chasen learns incredibly quickly. The notion that you have to hire an expert to teach your child to play is a little hard to come to grips with. Chasen went through a lot of that and now does really well. But some things that most children just kind of learn by osmosis need to be taught to a child with Asperger's."

• Toni Braxton⁹

...Grammy award winning R&B singer/songwriter

Born March 31, 2003 her son Diezel was diagnosed with autism. "Songstress Toni Braxton appeared on The View today in her new role as a spokesperson to raise awareness for children diagnosed with autism. It is a subject that hit very close to home, since Toni Braxton's own youngest son, Diezel, 3, was diagnosed with autism in September 2006."

• Steven Stills¹⁰

...Of the famed music group Crosby, Stills, and Nash who had their heyday in the 1970s and sold millions of records

Son Henry Stills who was in Autism: The Musical. Henry was diagnosed at 3 with Asperger's syndrome. He had been spinning things and lining up cars. "I'm shy about going public with this," Stephen explains. Kristen, his mom, believes autism is caused by a combination between genetic predisposition and environmental toxins. "Henry didn't have the regressive thing," she explains. "He was always a little 'off.' It was more pronounced at 2 because that's when kids are more social."

• Dan Marino¹¹

...Hall of Fame quarterback for the NFL team Miami Dolphins

Born May 18, 1988, in the middle of Dan's successful football career, Michael Marino was diagnosed as a child. Today he seems like any other normal kid. Mikey says, "The only thing I really remember about having autism was wanting to say something and not being able to do it. It's pretty weird to explain. It's like you are a perfectly normal person on the inside, you know what you want to do, but you just can't do it. You know you want to say something, pick up something or do something, but you are just not able to do it."

• Doug Flutie¹²

...Retired quarterback who played in the NFL as well as Canadian Football League and others

Doug Flutie, Jr. was born on November 29, 1991. Up until the age of 2 1/2 he seemed to be developing normally and spoke in almost full sentences. Then the Fluties noticed a gradual change in Dougie; he seemed to be regressing. He went from speaking in sentences to phrases, then to single words. Eventually he lost all speech.

• Sylvester Stallone¹⁵

...Movie actor best known for starring in the Rambo and Rocky franchises

Seargeoh Stallone, Sly's youngest son who was born in 1979, was diagnosed wth autism around age 3. Seargeoh's mother, Sasha Czack, was Sly's first wife. Stallone has narrated videos on children with disabilities.

• Will Clark¹⁶

...Former Major League Baseball player nicknamed "The Thrill", best known for his time with the San Francisco Giants

Will's son, Trey, who was born around 1996 was diagnosed as autistic shortly after the age of 2. Since Will was still playing baseball at the time he admits that wife, Lisa, is the one who handled all the therapy appointments.

• John Travolta¹⁷

...Major actor and movie star

In mid-September of 2009 Travolta admitted before a grand jury that his late son, Jett, had autism. Prior to his statements on this day there was speculation from many people that his only son was autistic. Jett died after having a seizure at age 16.

when it rains... it pours

Year 2010 was not a great year for us. it was during this time when my daughter was formally diagnosed with ASD, my father in law passed away, my mother in law got sick, i have to leave my job, all our savings were used up. it was such a roller coaster ride and at age 28 i never imagined that life could be as difficult as this.

Year 2011 comes. new year, new hope. i wonder what moms with neurotypical kids wish for their child? sguro some moms are thinking of buying ipad for their kids pag nakakuha ng 85 na average sa card, or maybe some are planning a grand vacation with their kids this summer, or pasyal sa Enchanted Kingdom with the whole family.

But for me, iba ang gusto ko for my daughter. hahahaha, weird pero sana pag pumunta kami sa Toy Kingdom sana she will get a toy, show it to me, and tell me "mama pls buy this toy". naku baka maski worth ng 3 month na therapy nya ung toy na yun bibilin ko for her. =)

When it rains, it pours... last week my husband told me that he was offered to be the Assistant Section Manager of their department. it all depends on him if he will take it or not. last month may bagong lipat kami na neighbor and they have 2 kids. it's good kase it means that my daughter will have playmates na so i believe magiimprove ang social skills nya pag may kids around!! This afternoon the principal in my daughter's school spoke to me. she told me 3 things. first, dont let her wear diaper in school starting tomorrow( mam, hindi pa po completely toilet trained ang anak ko). second, please bring rice meal and peanut butter para daw mapractice ung tongue(ok po, i'll just bring her favorite ulam para kumain sya ng marami). third, mommy ang bilis ng progress nya, speech lang ang problema. pag tuloy tuloy ang progress nya until end of this school year ilalagay ko na sya sa mainstream (WHAT?! mainstream po?) yes mommy, kase ok na imitation skills nya, receptive,cognitive ang laki ng improvement.

So far this is the best news i have ever heard! all the hardships are worth it. im so proud of what she has become. in just a matter of 1 year i never thought that she will progress this fast. yes, my daughter is still autistic but im just happy to know that the path to recovery is not dark after all. is it because of biomedicine? traditional therapies? my unconditional love for her?well i guess yes, it's a combination of all of these. but above all i believe trusting God that He will provide our heart's desire is the answer to all my questions. we just need to hang in there even though we feel that the rope is getting shorter and shorter. then mkikita nlng natin na magpapadala ng helicopter si God pra di tayo mahulog. =) thank you Lord for all the blessings.

in my daughter's eyes-Martina Mcbride

this is the song i sing to my daughter even when she was still in my womb and until now i sing this to her when i put her to sleep.

In my daughter's eyes I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light and the
world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me gives me
strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe
In my daughter's eyes

And when she wraps her hand
around my finger
Oh it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about

It's hangin' on when your heart
has had enough
It's giving more when you feel like giving up
I've seen the light
It's in my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes I can see the future
A reflection of who I am and what will be
Though she'll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family
When I'm gone I hope you see how happy
she made me
For I'll be there
In my daughter's eyes

James Durbin and American Idol

I have been an fan of American Idol. i dont have the time to watch it every episode but when i do, im hoping to catch James Durbin performing.

I saw the episode during his audition. he was good looking and definitely has a great voice. Every singer has something to say about their life and their struggles, but James has caught my attention. As a child, he never met his father and was taking medications for sleep disorder. But when i saw one photo wherein he was not looking to the camera and his brother is holding his face to look to the camera, i felt that it was just not sleep disorder, i feel like there was something else. then he mentioned when he was younger other children made fun of him, asking him to stop what he's doing with his face.but he said he cant control it. then he said it.. he has Asperger Syndrome(high functioning autism) and Tourette.

he's so good that when i look at him i cant see any signs that he is an aspie. Then i think to myself, is he on biomed and gfcf diet or taking mb12 shots? hahahah!! if i could just vote, i would definitely give it to him. he has such a powerful voice and when he sings everything else seems to go away.

Seth Rollins was a contestant during the last season of American Idol. I remember him singing Someone to watch over me which he dedicated to his son who has autism. When he was about to go inside the audition room to meet with the judges, his son started to cry showing that separation could be really tough on the young guy.